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Plastered
by Paris
What is
it about
the
media
which
makes
people
with
virtually
no
discernable
talent
so
utterly
addictive?
Jade
Goody
for
example
has
amassed
a
considerable
amount
of money
by
making a
complete
idiot of
herself
on a
voyeuristic
TV
programme.
She was
so
stupid
the
first
time the
directors
couldn’t
resist
getting
her back
for
another
dose and
she
certainly
didn’t
disappoint
them.
And so
to Ms
Paris
Hilton,
heiress
to a
fortune,
although
now
somewhat
reduced
fortune,
model,
party
girl,
singer
???,
property
developer
and
anything
else
that she
thinks
she can
do. Her
rise to
the
higher
echelons
of fame
was
mainly
due to
an
explicit
sex film
‘released’
on the
internet
by her
ex-boyfriend.
The
embarrassing
footage
just
happened
to
materialise
a week
before
she
launched
her
television
career
with the
first
series
of The
Simple
Life.
What a
coincidence
that
was.
Since
then the
Barbie
look-a-like
hasn’t
looked
back.
Until
that is
she was
forced
to spend
23 days
in the
Century
Regional
Detention
Centre,
after
she was
caught
driving
her
Bentley
on
Sunset
Boulevard
while
disqualified
following
a
drink-drive
conviction.
It
should
have
been 45
days but
the beak
cut the
sentence
because
of good
behaviour
as in
she
actually
turned
up for a
preliminary
hearing.
I can
just
imagine
you or I
receiving
a
similar
reduction.
On
release
she said
her life
had
changed,
she had
found
God and
the
party
days
were
over.
Well we
didn’t
believe
that one
darling.
In fact
since
her
release
a new
version
of the
sex
video is
set to
be
released
with
brand
new
'collectable
prison
packaging'.
Paris,
the
distributors
say,
gets a
'directorial
credit'.
How
quaint
and not
too
embarrassing
then..
Her
fearsome
and
pushy
mother
Kathy
Hilton,
is said
to be
the
brains
behind
the
Paris
express.
She is a
48-year-old
former
bitpart
actress
and
part-time
model
who once
had
walk-on
parts in
1970s
shows
The
Rockford
Files
and
Happy
Days.
Big time
programmes
they
were. It
was she
who
launched
six year
old
Paris on
the road
to
stardom
when she
entered
the two
of them
into a
fashion
show at
the
exclusive
Beverly
Hills
Hotel.
Both
were
plastered
in
makeup
and the
young
Paris
was
dressed
provocatively
in a
bikini.
Since
those
simplistic
days
it’s now
full on
Paris.
"I'm
developing
my own
hotels,
casinos
and
clubs
and
getting
into
real
estate.
It's
crazy at
such a
young
age. I'm
doing so
much,"
she
trilled
recently.
Obviously
a few
days in
the
slammer
is good
for
business
because
she has
just
completed
the
sixth
series
of her
reality
show The
Simple
Life for
which
she will
be paid
a
reported
£5
million.
Then
there’s
£1
million
deal
with a
cosmetics
firm.
And
don’t
forget
the£1million
with
amazon.com
to
market
her own
jewellery
designs,
which
are not
actually
her
designs.
Oh yes,
she also
nets
about
£200,000
a year
for her
patented
Paris
Hilton
Watch,
yours
for the
special
price of
just
£35.50.
Not
Rolex
then. Or
you
could
buy a
pair of
Paris
Hilton
sunglasses,
rubber
stamps,
hair
extensions
or the
new
Bella
Paris
pet
clothes
range as
modelled
by her
Yorkshire
terrier
puppy
Cinderella.
Last
month,
she
launched
her new
swimwear
collection,
on
Malibu
beach
and
guess
what!
Such bad
luck,
her
bikini
top only
just
happened
to slip
down,
revealing
her
boobs as
she
frolicked
in the
surf –
and
you’ll
never
believe
it but
there
just had
to be a
horde of
paparazzi
snapping
at just
that
precise
moment.
She did
lose her
£600,000
deal to
promote
the Club
Paris
chain
earlier
this
year
after
she
failed
to turn
up for a
series
of
planned
appearances.
Too busy
love,
sorry
can’t be
bothered.
Small
change
anyway.
But then
tragedy.
OK,
perhaps
that’s a
bit
strong,
maybe a
wheel
came off
is a
better
way of
putting
it. Her
behaviour
has so
angered
her
grandfather
Barron
Hilton,
head of
the
Hilton
clan,
that he
has cut
off her
£25
million
inheritance.
Ouch !
According
to Jerry
Oppenheimer,
the
author
of House
Of
Hilton,
"He was,
and is,
extremely
embarrassed
by how
the
Hilton
name has
been
shamed
by Paris
and he
doesn't
want to
leave
unearned
wealth
to his
family."
And who
could
really
blame
him for
feeling
embarrassed?
His
fame-hungry
granddaughter
is known
for her
nonstop
partying,
23 days
spent
locked
in the
slammer,
her
propensity
for
shedding
her
clothes
and her
enthusiastic
performance
in a
home sex
video.
Probably
her best
performance
to date
but
shame
does not
register
too
highly
in the
small
but no
doubt
perfectly
former
or
surgically
enhanced
brain of
the fame
addicted
blonde.
Ok she
has made
a couple
of
films,
but they
were so
dire
they
were
immediately
packaged
off to
the DVD
forget
it
shelf.
Sure she
does a
bit of
modelling
but so
does my
friends
granny.
Yes, I
know she
released
an
album.
Released
is
perhaps
over
doing it
because
I think
the damn
thing
escaped!
The
much-derided,
self-titled
dross
had one
critic
describe
it as
sounding
"like a
Sloane
Ranger
having
an
asthma
attack".
Nice way
of
putting
it I
thought.
But
incidentals
such as
talent
have, of
course,
never
put off
the
thrusting
Paris
and sure
enough
she is
returning
to the
studio
to make
a second
album.
God help
the
producer
and give
him
strength
and
patience.
In
between
songs
she is
updating
her
best-
selling
autobiography
Confessions
Of An
Heiress,
plus a
bit of
‘acting’
which
will see
her star
in The
Hottie
And The
Nottie,
about a
girl who
refuses
to marry
her
boyfriend
until he
finds a
suitor
for her
ugly
best
friend.
Wow I’m
gripped
already.
And
there
lies the
heart of
my
question.
OK so I
picked
on her
but
there
are
loads of
others
who seem
to defy
logic,
have no
perceivable
talent,
apart
from
good
looks in
some
cases
and yet
the
tabloids
are
falling
over
themselves
to
elevate
them
into the
eighth
wonder
of the
world.
Why ?
Can
these
magazines
really
lose 40%
circulation
if Paris
or
another
nothing
isn’t on
the
front.
Do the
tabloids
really
believe
that
pictures
of
whoever
carrying
a bag of
shopping
out of a
supermarket
is
interesting.
I
sometimes
believe
the
power of
the
press is
almost
too
overbearing
and an
old
adage
springs
to mind.
If you
say it
long
enough
people
will
believe
you. I
am off
to lie
down in
a dark
room now
because
in
researching
this
article
I found
undeniable
proof of
that
very
fact.
Bollywood
film
director
T.
Rajeevnath
is said
to be a
big fan
of Paris
and is
keen to
cast her
in his
next
film.
The
unlikely
role for
our
pillar
of the
party
society,
sex
videos
and
unfound
talent
……..only
Mother
Teresa.
The mind
boggles.
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