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On Your
Own this
Christmas?
by
Bejay
Browne
For many
of us
Christmas
is a
special
time of
year,
celebrations
with
family
and
friends,
church
services,
laughter,
good
food,
merriment
and of
course,
presents.
But for
some
people
the
festive
season
leaves
them
feeling
isolated,
alone,
unhappy
and in
some
cases
suicidal.
Christmas
can
magnify
loneliness
especially
for
those
who have
lost
loved
ones or
maybe
simply
feel
they
don't
fit in
with the
rest of
the
world.
Whilst
most are
walking
with a
spring
in their
step and
planning
family
reunions
or
ordering
free-range
turkeys,
some are
filled
with
hopelessness
and
despair.
It may
be
argued
that
Christmas
has
become
heavily
commercialised
and
Cyprus
hasn't
escaped
the
onslaught
along
with the
fact the
build up
to 'the
big day'
begins
close to
the
beginning
of
October.
Walking
around a
well
known
local
Paphos
supermarket
during
the
first
weekend
in
October,
still
sporting
summer
attire,
you
could
have
been
surprised
when
confronted
with an
array of
synthetic
Christmas
trees,
coloured
bulbuls,
tinsel
and the
fake
snow. No
corner
of the
world is
spared
from the
tidal
wave of
commercial
greed
which
gathers
momentum
during
the
autumn.
But
after
pondering
the
situation
your
thoughts
could
turn to
those on
their
own;
perhaps
people
who have
recently
moved to
Cyprus
and
those
for whom
Christmas
will be
a living
hell.
Maybe
these
rather
tacky
decorations
will be
the
start of
their
personal
purgatory,
which
will
carry on
in to
January.
From a
personal
perspective
I like
Christmas.
I like
going to
midnight
mass,
singing
carols,
wrapping
presents,
filling
stockings
and
cooking
a
sumptuous
turkey
with all
the
trimmings.
I toast
friends
and
relatives,
some who
are
sadly no
longer
here and
I am
thankful
for the
good
things
in life.
I enjoy
the
build up
to
Christmas
Eve, but
two
weeks is
about my
limit.
However
the
lonely
close
their
eyes to
the
whole
event in
an
attempt
to hide
the real
and
deep-rooted
pain
they
feel.
It can
also be
stressful
if
you're
single.
Another
night in
the
spare
room of
your
parents
house
and
waking
up with
the
pre-requisite
smile
plastered
across
your
face.
Avoiding
'Uncle
Bob',
not a
relative
but a
great
friend
of your
fathers,
whose
lecherous
advances
under
the
drooping
mistletoe
are not
welcome.
As the
demographic
of
Paphos
is
changing,
there is
a real
need to
fill the
void for
Cypriots
and
foreigners
alike,
people
who may
not have
family
here, or
close
friends
who
spend
Christmas
with
their
children.
This
year a
number
of
Hotels
and
Restaurants
are
serving
Christmas
lunches
aimed at
single
people.
It may
not be
your
ideal
Christmas,
but it
is a
good way
to meet
new
people
of all
ages and
perhaps
form new
friendships.
There
are also
many
local
clubs to
join
ranging
from the
arts to
business,
fan
clubs to
motoring.
It's
also an
excellent
way to
make new
acquaintances
and
build up
friendships
with
like-minded
individuals.
Most of
these
groups
and
societies
have get togethers
over the
festive
season.
Loneliness
and
depression
are
terrible
feelings
and can
lead to
problems
such as
drinking
and drug
abuse
which in
the
severest
form can
perpetuate
suicidal
tendencies.
Depression
can also
lead to
real
medical
symptoms
and
physical
illnesses.
The
World
Health
organisation
has
released
statistics
which
support
the view
that in
a few
years
time
depression
will be
the
second
largest
cause of
death
worldwide.
For
those
desperate
people
there is
help at
hand.
The
Cyprus
Samaritans
were
established
in
Cyprus
in 1997
and are
now in
their
eleventh
year of
operation.
As with
the
Samaritans
worldwide
it is a
confidential
emotional
support
service
and is a
registered
charity
with all
the
people
involved
being
volunteers.
Peoples'
problems
here are
similar
to those
found in
the UK
and
Neville
Milner,
the
director
of The
Cyprus
Samaritans
explained
the
trends
in
Cyprus
are
following
those of
the UK.
Their
phones
are
currently
manned
daily
between
6pm-10pm,
although
he is
hoping
to be
able to
extend
these
hours
until
midnight
from
January
1st
2008.
Human
beings
are
individuals
and
emotional
capabilities
and
frailties
vary
from
person
to
person.
One
person's
molehill
may be
another’s
mountain
but the
Samaritans
are not judgemental,
they are
there to
listen.
The
island
wide
number,
should
you ever
need it,
is 77 77
72 67
Volunteers
apply to
be a
Samaritan
and then
are
hopefully
selected
for an
interview.
If
selected
they
will
attend
preliminary
training
and then
extensive
final
training.
It's not
easy for
obvious
reasons
and 40%
of
applicants
will be
lost
along
the way.
The few,
who make
it
through
to be a
Samaritan
will be
under
the
watchful
eye of a
mentor
until
they are
ready to
respond
to any
situation.
If you
feel you
would
like to
help in
some
way, the
Cyprus
Samaritans
are
looking
for
telephone
volunteers
and also
people
to work
in their
charity
shop.
They are
also
always
on the
lookout
for
donations
at their
Paphos
based
shop.
An
interesting
fact,
which
has been
uncovered
by the
Samaritans
in the
UK, is
that the
third
Monday
in
January,
nicknamed
'blue
Monday',
is the
day most
people
contact
them,
feeling
lonely,
depressed
and
isolated.
This may
be
explained
by the
fact the
festivities
are
over,
money
may be
tight
after
the
Christmas
frenzy
and
credit
card
bills
roll in.
With
this in
mind,
the
Cyprus
Samaritans
are
aiming
to
operate
their
telephone
lines
for a
full 24
hours on
this
date,
Monday
January
21st
2008.
However,
it is
important
to
remember
that all
of us
have a
choice.
None of
us are
really
on our
own and
sometimes
all it
takes is
a little
courage
to reach
out for
help and
support,
or to
reach
out to
someone
you feel
may need
a
friend.
Christmas
is a
time
which
more
than any
highlights
the
words,
Love thy
neighbour.
If you
know of
someone
you
think
may be
alone
this
Christmas,
invite
him or
her
round
for a
mince
pie or
turkey
sandwich.
You
never
know,
you may
really
make a
difference
to
someone's
Christmas.
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